By Fred Topel | Image property of Warner Bros Pictures.
Fool's Gold seems like it was assembled from elements that people liked in other movies by people who didn't understand what people liked about those other movies. How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days was no masterpiece, but it was the right elements for the right time.
Review: Fool's Gold
Right away, you know you're in trouble with the supporting characters. Those island gangsters (on Florida for some reason) and the gay chefs don't bode well. I mean, can you believe she has gay buddies? Awwww. Eventually you'll meet the spoiled rich girl and more wonderful stereotypes.
What passes for romantic banter is Matthew McConaughey backtracking every time he's called out. Kate Hudson screams and breaks plates when he surprises or frustrates her. Just in case you didn't notice how cute that was, they play a cute, bouncy score for our adoration.
The comedy, aside from the delightfully cliché archetypes, involves pondering the gerund form of steward. Then the gay chefs, rasta voiced gangsters and bratty young girl fill in the rest.
Action scenes consist of one gag dragged out and delayed just long enough to qualify as action. They're the same gags you've seen before, dodging a weapon between one's legs, shooting through chains and of course, a Mexican standoff.
So, those elements I think they were trying to combine was the bickering couple forced to be at odds but who really love each other, the hunt for historical treasure and sex appeal. Even as an excuse to show fabulous bodies in bikinis, Fool's Gold is still unwatchable. There are mesmerizing golden abs but they've missed all of the context that would make those elements interesting.
Fool's Gold makes Six Days, Seven Nights look like Raiders of the Lost Ark. It makes Pirates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End look like Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl. It makes Into the Blue look like everything.